March 20, 2014

I like drinking tea alone, and reading alone.

"For almost 18 years you’re taught to sit down, shut up, and raise your hand. Then you have to decide what you’re going to do for the rest of your life."

I'm at that point in my life right now where I'm just waiting for the day to end so that the next day can come. I repeat the same cycle of what I do the previous day and at the back of my mind, I'm constantly worrying about what my future will hold and whether or not I will like it. Night time is probably the worst at this stage. I start to think and reflect on my life and then I will feel like I just want to stop time and stop worrying. Stop worrying about the fact that I have to constantly satisfy people and listen to what they have to say or do what they want me to do. 

Applying for Universities, applying for a scholarship and applying for jobs. The wait for the results is so hard to endure especially with you knowing that it'll most probably not be successful but you want to believe that you may have a chance at it. Sometimes I wonder if I may have taken the wrong path in life. Should I have taken up something more safer in life like a Business course or something. Is it wrong or ignorant for me to say that there are people who don't know what they want, they just choose to study Business? I apologize if I have offended anyone. 

It has been about a month ever since school ended and tomorrow is finally results day. This Final Year Project results is going to be the one that decides on where I'll be able to study at in the future. I just pray for the best and until then, I'm just going to continue drinking my green tea and enjoy the book that I'm reading. 

I wish all my fellow DVFX graduates good luck in their results and I wish for the best for all of us.